closing time

well, it's here. the time i have dreaded. it's finally hitting me. all my bags are packed and i'm uploading the last of my madrid photos to my computer. i cannot fathom that i'm waking up at 6am and leaving madrid. up until this point there has been a little bit of excitement about going home but in this moment i actually don't feel any. the worst part is i'm not even crying, i'm just literally the saddest. not even a final purchase at zara could make me smile.

last night could not have been more of a successful last hurrah. the girls decorated their apartment like christmas, got a gin bucket together, and everyone that i could have wanted to be there was there. we went to pacha and danced the night away together. twas fabulous. i think the people on this program are a big part of what made this semester so fun and memorable. we have our own lil fambam. saying bye to people tonight is where the tears are gonna start flowing. we had a final lunch today with our entire program and the IES faculty. that's when it sunk in that i'm not gonna see these people ever again. these people that have had a pretty large impact on my life for the past 4 months. sharing an experience like this together created such interesting friendships. we'll always have madrid.

this blog has definitely served its purpose. and i'm proud of myself for sticking with it. i know years from now i'll love the fact that i can read it and reminisce. i might even keep writing it back home, just because organizing my thoughts and writing them here really is nice. and because when people read it i feel popular. obvi. 

i feel like i should be writing more but i really can't even express the million things running through my head right now. deciding to spend my fall semester here was one of the best decisions i have ever made. the highs were so high, and the lows were devastatingly low, but i can honestly say that i'm leaving here with no regrets. there's nothing i would go back and change. everything that has happened this semester has happened for a reason, even though i might never know what those reasons are.  i've learned so much about myself. i've traveled throughout europe. i've formed wonderful friendships. and i've appreciated it all.


it's been real, madrid. thanks for giving me the time of my life.

sunset from the best rooftop in madrid

48 hours

i don't think i have ever been this emotionally unstable in my life. i change my mind literally every hour about coming home. i'm not sure if it makes any sense, but i am excited to go home, without wanting to leave. i know being home for the holidays and going back to school to reunite with my friends is going to be so nice. i am looking forward to iced coffees, being able to choose when and what i can eat for lunch, driving a car, and even doing school work in english. i want to decorate my christmas tree, go to my favorite cafe, and get drunk with my best friends.  but i always forget that things at home aren't the same as when i left. while i've been living in this dream world everyone else has carried on with their normal lives. i'm sure they've grown and changed just like i have. i'm a little afraid to have to adjust in a setting where i'm normally so comfortable.

also, leaving here is unlike leaving anywhere i've ever been. i've never really lived somewhere and had to leave knowing that i'm not coming back. at least not for a long time. this experience has been in my head since freshman year of college and now i'm about to be done with it. how is that possible?

today i walked around and tried to take everything in. i snapped pics left and right and enjoyed every minute of it. also, we had our last lunch with marisol and eduardo. they really are the most loving and genuine people. my relationship with them feels unlike any other adult relationship i've had. it's nothing like a relationship with parents, grandparents, or friends. i don't know what it's like but i know i'm going to miss it and be forever grateful for it. i love madrid. i cannot be more happy with my experience here. sometimes me and kim try to think of how we're gonna respond when people ask us "OMG how was spain?!" and i still don't even know how i'm going to begin to answer that question. words can't describe it.

on a less depressing and sentimental note, i gotta make my hair get dry before we rageragerage on our last night to do it big in spain. wish me luck.

procrastination

so i'm slowly coming to terms with the fact that i'm gonna be leaving in four days. i only have one more exam left and i really am not the least bit motivated. so instead i will sit here and stare at my suitcase that i'm gonna start filling. as excited as i am to use my iphone, see my amazing friends from home, and lay down on a couch with my feet up (yep, haven't done that in almost 4 months), i don't think i'm completely ready to leave.  it's a bummer because i feel like just as i'm getting totally settled into my routine here, it's over.

random things that i'll miss most:

• the hustle and bustle of the city. i can now definitely say that being surrounded by people and always having somewhere new to go is the kind of place i can see myself while i most likely most definitely continue to be perpetually single after college.  
• the friends i have made on this program. lucky for me two of my closest new friends go to school at f&m, only about an hour from nova. but i really did get lucky with the people i got to know this semester and i know i wouldn't have had such a positive experience without them. 
• the food. i know everyone raves about italian and greek food, but i'm telling you spain is where it's at. the fact that i won't see pig legs hanging from storefront windows and consuming croquettas on a daily basis is going to take some getting used to. 
• the freedom i have to travel. the fact that i have visited four countries other than spain this semester is crazy to think about. and it has turned me into a total travel junkie. i have added so many places onto my bucket list and appreciate the importance of travel so much more after this semester. 
• the random street performers. yes, sometimes they drive me insane or freak me out, but at other times a cute old couple playing the accordion and singing warms my heart. 
• the night life. obviously. madrid is one of the only places in the world where it is entirely socially acceptable to stay out until people start going to work at 6am. where am i supposed to go out in america? a bar? with only one floor? and no live dj? discotecas should migrate over to the USA.
• marisol and eduardo. doing a homestay was risky. it could have made or broken my experience here. i definitely lucked out by getting put with marisol and eduardo. they are the sweetest couple in all of spain and they really do treat me like one of their own. i need to make a conscious effort to try and keep in touch with them after i leave. 

sorry if this is sappy or whatever, but sins i want to live abroad forever. and by forever, i mean starting after villanova starts to get old around mid february and ending before christmas again next year. time to pack.  

final countdown

i just turned in one of my spanish final papers and took my second exam of the week. two down, two to go. this is a form of procrastination for me, along with watching youtube videos of my acapella group 24/7. i'm waiting for eduardo to get home from fixing the elevator (yes i just walked up six flights of stairs) so that we can have one of our last lunches all together. depression.

i can't believe this past weekend in madrid was my last. after my disaster of a friday night, i overcame my hangover and made it out to a super crowded bar to watch el clasico. i'd rather not discuss the fact that barcelona won, it wasn't a highlight of the night. however, i'm so glad that i got to experience what such a big game is like! i can get competitive pretty easily so even though i don't know the names of more than two real madrid players, the fact that i've lived here for almost 4 months basically makes me a lifelong fan. sunday morning i woke up early to go to my last rastro ever. got myself some nice spanish decorations for my room next semester. then i unfortunately had to finish my 7 page spanish film paper and study for the exam i had today. only one short paper and two finals stand in between me and libertad. once wednesday gets here i'm probably going to have more than one mental breakdown about packing, leaving, and trying to get everything in before 10:45 saturday morning.

not thinking about it until then. ttfn.

iamsterdam

i have unfortunately been bedridden all day due to my first and hopefully last paralyzing hangover of the semester. it was bound to happen eventually, but it's far less of an annoyance when the night that caused your head to be throbbing and stomach to be turning was of epic proportions. of course, because my life is a broma, the pregame was as far as i got. #winning. i'm hoping tonight will make up for it though cause its the real madrid vs barcelona futbol game and its going to be insane. its the perfect distraction from my seven page paper that i've barely started. never have i ever been less stressed about finals. something about this countdown (seven days) makes me realize how unimportant my grades are in the grand scheme of things.

amsterdam stories:

we flew on an actual airline into amsterdam after a day of classes on monday and it was amazing. my chair reclined, i had legroom, and i even got food! dream. we arrived at our hostel which was more or less an irish bar that had a few bedrooms upstairs. we were located right in the red light district, which was an experience to say the least. prostitution is legal there and although there weren't any on our street, there were a ton throughout the entire district. they literally stand in storefront looking windows in their lingerie and men can just walk up to them all night long. a lot of times the windows were connected by a door and a couple o prosties would just be casually chattin while they wait for their client. it was very strange to be around. i probably would have felt a lot more uncomfortable if i was sober or something. moving on...after crashing monday night we woke up and ate a yummy breakfast in our bar and went off to find the house where anne frank lived while her family was in hiding. it took us a while and there were casual sporadic hail storms but we finally made it. this house turned museum was one of my favorite places i've been all semester. nazi germany is so interesting for me and this museum was so well done. anne franks story is humbling, devastating, and inspiring all at the same time. i obviously bought her diary at the bookshop and i plan on reading it during my trek home next week. we wandered to a pancake house for lunch to get some traditional dutch food and went to go on a canal tour. after floating down the many many canals that make amsterdam one of the most unique cities i've seen in europe, we went to check out some coffee shops. how could i blog about amsterdam without mentioning drugs? coffee shops are places all over the city where you can get food, drinks, and pre-rolled joints. they all have different atmospheres and crowds of people. on our first night there we hopped from shop to shop for like 4 hours. it didn't feel like real life.

the next day we decided to rent bikes like every other human that has ever been to amsterdam. i literally saw more parked bikes than cars over the course of the weekend. i have to admit that i'm not the most coordinated on a bike and cars/people make me nervous while riding. amsterdam didn't cater to me whatsoever. there were a handful of times where i thought a bus was going to kill me, i got separated from the entire group, and i walked my bike halfway home. however, i think it was worth it. when i wasn't being a spaz, it was a beautiful ride. we rode to the van gogh museum and to take pics at the iamsterdam sign. i never realized how much i really like van gogh's style. so. many. colors. we found a magical bagel shop for lunch before returning our bikes. i'm worried this bagel separation i've been having might result in bagel overdose when i get back to america. once it got dark, which is at like 4:45 in the netherlands, we went to the heineken factory! shannon's dad werked his connections and got us in for free. holllllla. this tour was super fun and it included two beers. also, since we're pretty or something, lenart the bartender gave us a few free ones. i still don't totally understand how water, yeast, barley, and hops can make me blackout, but some things must remain a mystery. after dropping some stuff off at the barhostel we took to the streets again to coffee shop hop. just like in belgium, amsterdam provided such a chill atmosphere. everyone was laid back, spoke english, and promoted drug use. i knew i wanted to experience amsterdam from the minute i decided to study abroad and it lived up to every expectation. i couldn't think of a better place to end my travels.

strolling over canals

coffee shop life

welcome to the red light district

iamsterdam

brewin some beer

hai

a little late...

so i haven't exactly gotten around to blogging about my amazing trip to brussels until now. my bad for making two trips to and from the netherlands in one week. poor planning of course. also, i have a spanish final that i missed the final review of and have not even began to start studying. clearly, this semester abroad has really made me a more responsible student. anyway, i finally have the time and brain power to give the dirty deets on my trip to belgium. (amsterdam post to come.)

the flight to belgium was the last ryanair (aka cheapest but worst airline company ever) flight of the semester thank god because i'm getting sick and tired of packing three days worth of trendy clothes into a backpack and sitting in seats that don't recline. also, i realized after taking the bus, then metro, then walking 15 mins to our hostel that i'm really looking forward to getting off a plane, and having someone there in a car to drive me home. the public transportation and walking in the rain was worth it though, cause our hostel slash bed and breakfast was better than i could have imagined. it was an actual cozy home, complete with a dog. Karel was the man who owned the house and he lives there with his nugget sixteen year old euro child. he was actually the sweetest little man and very helpful throughout the weekend. me and kim got put in the old master bedroom of the house. it had the most comfortable bed i've slept on in months. with an actual down comforter. imagine that. however, there was an aussie couple as our roomates, traveling the world romantically together for 9 months. nauseatingly living my dream life. they were nice...until they started cuddling and me and kim had to use facebook chat to communicate across the room and avoid awkwardness. 

early the next morning, we set out to see the city. we totally lucked out with weather and managed to get around being stuck in the rain. we walked all over and found the royal palace, grand palace, and most importantly, the famous statue of a little kid peeing. no joke. its the size of a toddler. oh, and it gets dressed up for special occasions. 

after eating our first of many amazing one euro waffles of the trip, we wandered to find the christmas markets! the entire city was decorated with lights and trees and even a live animal nativity scene. we picked the right time of year to visit. we finally spotted the giant ferris wheel and walked up and down the blocks of booths. most of them were food and alcohol, but of course i managed to purchase three new pieces of jewelry. oh, and we stopped for lunch at a burger place, being true americans. they were surprisingly the bomb.com. after going back to the bed and breakfast to shower and lay down for a bit, we went back to the plaza with the grand palace to see a christmas light show. choreographed to music from the nutcracker obvi. it was actually one of the only and best light shows i've sat through. then we started drinking glasses of hot, spiced, red wine (a drink that i will be making many a time next semester.) we managed to meet up with some of kim's friends i had met in barcelona and we went to a bar called delirium, known in brussels for having 2000 beers on tap. YUP. 2000. i drank some dark beers, tryin to be adventurous. and a mysterious spanish man, who spoke french and english, told me i was guapa with good smelling hair and bought me a strawberry beer. i was beyond satisfied. belgian beer is a lil stronger than i thought. nothing like natty. 

the next morning we slept off our slight hangovers and actually went on a spontaneous day trip to brugge, a small town about an hour away from brussels by train. this was probably the best decision we made all weekend. this town was the definition of quaint. actually adorable. all the streets are cobblestone and complete with chocolate shops on every corner. there is a canal that runs through the whole thing, inhabited by a million swans and ducks. we only planned on being in brugge for a few hours, and we ended up staying the entire day. we didn't have a map and just wandered until it got dark and we found more christmas markets! we treated ourselves to an actual sit down dinner for the first time all weekend and then headed back to brussels for our last night. this trip was just the relaxing vacation from a vacation that i needed. of course, less than 24 hours after returning to madrid, i headed back up to the netherlands to spend my last free days in amsterdam. but that's a story for next time. i need to start studying for the first of my exams tomorrow. hooray. 

rofl's for waffles

ferris wheel selfie

light show!

beautiful brugge.

gingerbread lookin houses. 

25 days of christmas

happy december 1st! i had to buy my last monthly pass for the metro today...not gonna lie it was a strange feeling. 25 days of christmas starts now and i'm kicking it off buy hoppin on over to belgium for the weekend. i'm sitting in my school's cafeteria writing this cause i got here aggressively early, and i'm one class away from a winter wonderland. bad news is: it supposed to rain all weekend. OF COURSE. but i'm not gonna let it ruin mah trip. also, i may or may not be staying in a hostel that is a little old man's house complete with a tiny dog. Karel (the belgian man who owns the house/hostel) has already sent me a few emails about my stay and i am very anxious to see what this weekend has in store. i predict eating my body weight in waffles and spending too many euros on mini santas. welp, off to one of my last days of grammar class.